I tend to get really frustrated with myself. A lot. I changed out my IUD and now have to deal with a fuckass period for a bit. Don't know when that will resolve itself. Whatever.
I feel very stunted right now. Logically, there's no reason to feel that way, y'know? I had a wonderful weekend. I spend a lot of it with Kanz and Chrys. My pen is running out of ink when I hold it a specific angle. Shit rocks. I'm being annoying and sarcastic. Am I writing too hard on this paper? I think that might be happening. Lol.
I want to be a better partner. A better friend. A better person-- why do I feel like everyone is making it so hard for me to do that? RAAH!!
Let's talk about my dumbass frustration I'm experiencing currently. After Kanz spent the weekend here, we talked about how he would like to stay over more often. I asked him if he needed explicit invites from us to feel more comfortable coming over. He said yes, so I guess I made it a point to do just that. I asked him if he wanted to come over and finish school work at our place, or just come over to hang out. He dodged my questions multiple times. I get frustrated because just... Tell me? I guess? I'm a big girl. I can handle it. I'll mope quietly to myself for a bit, but I am understanding. If you can be straight up about a lot of different things, let this be one of those things, too.
I don't know. I'm trying to give him the grace and the benefit of the doubt, but it's so easy to antagonize others or shift the blame onto myself. I know there's no issue-- I'm just overthinking it.
Universe, help me be more understanding and graceful to those I may not immediately understand. Help me be a better person and partner.